SO LET’S CELEBRATE BY DANCING ALL NIGHT AT THE CROWN ROOM.

(k8 will be pleased that I have no flyer for this one…  )

Anyway, Cory O and CMNHTN will be throwing down for your audio pleasure at The Crown Room tonight from ’round 10 pm til they kick us out.  If you need more dance awesomeness in your life, they are two good ones to know.  There’s sure to be some dubstep but I’m willing to bet they’ve got plenty more up their proverbial sleeves.  And there’s NO COVER.  Save yer cash for the bar.

If that’s not your bag, Off the Grid and Graintable are playing at Goodfoot.  I do always heart some Graintable and I just heard that the lovely Mr. Russell Scott will be sitting in with Off the Grid.  This will be YUMMY and well worth your $6 cover.

More tomorrow………

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**Management would like to formally apologize for the lack of visual stimulation in regards to today’s blog.  It’s been an awesome, busy fucking day.  Come dance with a PARTyMOM tonight and come back for mind-blowing blog awesomeness tomorrow?**

Tonight:
Wünderkinder CMNHTN and Nicky Mason recently fed our heads with http://soundcloud.com/cmnhtn/nicky-mason-cmnhtn-feed-your-head-vol-3 and I recently had the pleasure of catching Lions Den for the first time at XV the other night.  And NO COVER! This one will not suck, kids.

Or bounce over to Jig-A-Blown tonight at The Crown Room.

Yes.  You will find me at one or the other tonight.  I can’t miss either.  It’s a moral imperative…

Saturday:

• AstroGirl is liquidating the contents of her loft–537 SE Ash St., #24.  Check this: http://portland.craigslist.org/mlt/gms/1504933121.html and help a sista out.  Girlfriend’s got some amazing stuff–furniture, clothing, kitchen items, Burning Man gear (she hooked me up my first year out), vintage, craft/sewing supplies… Get over there and score some super awesome shit.  No joke–SUPER AWESOME.

• My friend, Jessie, is also participating in a Holiday Craft Bazaar this weekend.  If you’ve never met Jessie, she might be one of the most stylish, creative people I’ve ever had the pleasure to meet.  You’ll find handcrafted jewelry, bebe hats, nifty holiday gift ideas at 4035 SE Harrison in Milwaukie, Oregon 97222 from 12-5 on Saturday and 12-4 on Sunday, the 12th.  Have a snack and say HI!

And I will have to kick your ass if you don’t make it to one of the White Album Christmas shows.
The Nowhere Band is a supergroup of Portland talent that can often be seen otherwise in MarchFourth Marching Band, Trashcan Joe, Stereovision, Roxy Epoxy and the Rebound and Solovox, just to name a few.  These guys aren’t fucking around when they tell you they will play The Beatles’ White Album in its entirety.  And with the addition of Wanderlust Circus it is a heart-melting, mind-blowing, epic aural experience.  It has been known to bring its audience to tears, it is that good.  I’m not joking when I say I want to make love to this show and have its love children.  You have two opportunities to see it–Saturday, December 12 and Saturday, December 19. I heard a rumor that it might be the last time so DON’T MISS IT!

And then there’s this:
Mayhaps you heard me mention it one time?  I’ve been waiting all year for Rusko (I missed him the last time he was in p.town) but there’s more… Have you read this flyer?  Have you noticed the Who’s Who of Portland dubstep dudes supporting this?  These are boys for whom I’ve been known to drop everything because they play it exactly how I want it.  Two floors of orgasms for your ears on Saturday night.  YUMMMMMMMMMM…

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• Click this: http://billsshoesbooze.com/ Crystal Bee will clown your shoe and kick your ass with her brain.

• And have you heard???  Bassnectar is coming to town on February 5.  Tickets will go on sale on December 17.  Can’t get enough of this guy.  I won’t be missing this one!

• And click this one too:  http://www.nochucknorris.com/

Time to dance.  See you on the floor.

Should be super yum; grimy, dubsteppy, soul-filled fun.  Let’s all give Keith and Peter hugs when we see them tonight?  kthx.

• If Joker’s not yer bag o’ fun, be sure to stop by Rotture for Fall Brawl.  No cover!  4 DJ teams, playing consecutive 30-minute sets all night long.  Rude Dudes and Holla n’ Oates and Club Crooks are some of my own local faves.  And the FOMO is getting me that I don’t get to check out Dundiggy (vs. Matt Nelkin) before the Rusko show.  Crap!  If you check it out, will you fill me in on all the fun, dancy details later?

I will be in Salem for the holiday, eating and drinking and carousing with my family for a bit.  This means I may have some time to kick it with the old Salem crew for a couple days.  Hit me up on email partymom [at] kerichang [dot] com.  Phone doesn’t work so well down there on Hidden Valley…

And Friday!  Dance those calories off at FUBAR

Everyone’s favorite team of handsome deejays will arise from all tryptophan-induced naps to bring you bangers and fun.  Bring Nathan Detroit some turkey and stuffing–I bet he’d hug you.

Saturday:

Babylon System….awww, yeah.  These are some dudes that know from sex for your ears.  Gonna be HOT.  And Boy Meets Club and BehniBubu just make it that much more appealing.  Have you been to BC’s?  I’ve been there once and I do love this little basement bar.

Should you require options for your Saturday night, there’s also:

• Dr. Adam is playing Massive 13 at The Crown Room.  Big party, great cause, awesome musical guests.

• Looks like there’s something going down at 24ten–LipLocked.  Might be a hot one.  My dear friend, Bryan Zentz, is playing and, well, he is just a magician behind the decks.

Don’t forget about Sonic Jelly on at Mt. Tabor Theater Lounge on Monday
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• Solovox-a-Thon still going on.  If you want to help Portland’s favorite electronic madman partake in Black Friday so he can continue to make “phat beatz and dope jamz,” you can hand Mischief some cash at The Vortex on Thursday or PayPal it to me at kerichang7 [at] gmail [dot] com.  Thank you to everyone who has donated so far. Your generosity is absolutely heartwarming to me and positively stunning to Solovox himself.
• Huge, huge THANK YOU to Andy Sterling and k8 for helping me with my car this week and props to Beaverton Hyundai for taking care of my sweet Cruella deLuxuryCar!
• UPCOMING…DON’T MISS THIS!

• And just because:

Happy Family Tryptophan Day.  Drive safely this holiday.  I am thankful for you.

There’s also shenanigans at Branx (Freaky Disco!), Groove Suite (R9), Buffalo Gap (live music) and Report (crayons and DJs!).  Izm is at East, Doctor Adam will be at Tube and for once, I have no clue what’s going on at The Crown Room.  Carl, your favorite singing bartender will be there.  Tip him very well if you stop by…….

Do you have plans for Saturday night yet?  If not, I’d strongly recommend this at Dante’s:

The Greatest Rock Experience Of All Time REDUX; a heavy-hitting bacchanal of bonafide rock and roll!

Heavy Liquid is a phenomenon for the good people of Earth.  It is an undeniable force of hybrid genetics specifically designed for maximum face-melting booty-shaking rocking sweat down.  From the core of epic Seattle band El Steiner, Heavy Liquid delivers the subversive early works of Iggy and the Stooges, the birthplace of the savage sub-culture.  As the Philharmonic nails the fuck out of Beethoven or Bach so does Heavy Liquid nail the Stooges.  Celebrate your own personal existence and experience the pure glory of rock.

Queens Of Oblivion
In the year of the Scavenger, the Season of the Bitch…..The Queens of Oblivion channel the alien and alienated, the decadence and excess of glam and disco era Bowie.  Press your space face close to ours, love, and be transported into the age of androgyny with tracks off Ziggy Stardust, Hunky Dory and Station to Station . This set is faithfully recreated with its soul intact by members of March Fourth Marching Band, Stereovision, Climber, the Nowhere Band, and the Stolen Sweets.

DJ GrungeRuckus shows us that the power of plaid, the chain wallet, and your head still speak a common tongue…known as GRUNGE.  One of the Pacific Northwest’s orneriest DJ’s executes a mass raid on the SubPop label and YOUR music collection.  Mosh the hell out of the fact that Britney Spears became the next big thing….

Manhandel
Surprise secret weapon of pure audio sextation. You won’t believe your ears.

Master Of Ceremonies…ELEVEN!!!
“ELEVEN,” the world’s most “turned-up” legend of rock and roll, returns from rehab for a rare Portland appearance to host the show!!  Having rocked-hard with everyone, everywhere since the birth of the amplifier, ELEVEN will once again take the stage and blast friends and fans alike with stories, music, and his never-aging hairdo.  He truly is “ONE LOUDER.”

• Performance art by aerialist Ariel Brantley-Dalglish.

• Special Guest Appearance by StiltPoleDanceWunderDuo:  Jeremiah Guske and Scarlett Torrance.

• Burlesque Entertainment:  Sadie La Guerre!  Why settle for “Bombshell” when you can be the whole damn war?

• Dance performance:  The Good Time Girls!  Sexy at it’s most titillating.

• 8 dollars; 21 and over

I guess if The Best Rock Show of All Time isn’t your bag, I’ll recommend heading over to Branx/Rotture on the other side of the river.  Bass Boom will be popping off with Ben Samples, Cory O.  and Boy Meets Club downstairs while Rainbow Arabia and She’s on Drugs play upstairs at Rotture.  I believe there’s a $6 cover for these shows too……….

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Wanna hear something sad?  I’ll be visiting the family in Salem for the Thanksgiving holiday and have to miss this:

I die a little inside that I won’t see Joker here in p.town but I’ll bounce back.  Go and drink some whiskey for me next Wednesday night?

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For your New Year’s Eve consideration:

Tickets are available right now for $15 at Metro on SE Hawthorne or at http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/86458.

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And it’s also Solovox-A-Thon time!  Everyone’s favorite not-a-DJ needs a new computer so he can blow our minds at Drop the Bomb.  He was robbed of the BeatOff Competition title by one point, the proceeds of which would have gone to said new computer so we’re taking up a collection lest he go and do something crazy.   Our deadline is next Tuesday where Nico Bella will also donate her wages from her Woosday cooking gig at The Crown Room and we’re at least 1/6 of the way to our goal!  If you are a true Solovox fan, we’re just asking $5 or $10 and we do take PayPal!  PayPal it to me at kerichang7 [at] gmail [dot] com right now so that Carl can be a good American next Friday and go shopping.  Please?  I’ll be your best friend……..

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The Brasserie Montmartre is newly renovated and reopened.  This was one of my favorite Portland restaurants in the 90′s.  Who wants to go with me before it’s rat/cockroach/pervert infested?  Hurry!  Let’s go!

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I will see you at this tonight, ja?  I’ll be at both shows. Taking the Mini-Me to the early one.  (See also: HUGE THANK YOU to Heather McGarry, Andy and Sabrina Sterling and John Averill.)

And while you’re there, pick up a copy of Rise Up.  Recorded and mastered and all that shit right here in p.town by Jason Wells of AudioWells.  It’s a homegrown product that you desperately need to own because it might just be their best yet.  (Yes.  I have them all.)  The first track, Ninth Ward Calling, is dedicated to the citizens of New Orleans and a portion of the proceeds from this CD sale go to Sweet Home New Orleans, a non-profit whose mission is to support the individuals and organizations that will perpetuate New Orleans’s unique musical and cultural traditions.  SHNO helps musicians, Mardi Gras Indians and Social Aid and Pleasure Club members get on their feet, earn money from their art and pass on America’s most unique cultural traditions.

If that’s not enough to convince you, they’ve got some new material on there–Nightmarika being a new favorite.  It’s my favorite drinking band with a marching problem.  Actually, my favorite band on the planet.  Not too much makes me as happy as their music.  I love sharing this experience with everyone.  Hope to see you at The Wonder Ballroom.

And there’s an afterparty.  It’s the end of an era.  No joke.  Come see me at the show for more details.

More to come tomorrow because this weekend is a GOOD ONE FOR MUSIC.

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Solovox-A-Thon.  It’s on now.  He lost the BeatOff by ONE VOTE.  I call bullshit.  The proceeds from said BeatOff would have gone to replacing his computer that went kaput.  NOW TAKING DONATIONS SO CARL DOESN’T DO ANYTHING CRAZY. We had $57 within 45 minutes of his tragic loss last night!  See me at M4 tonight or PayPal it to me at kerichang7 [at] gmail [dot] com.  If 60 people donated $10, we’d be golden.  Nico Bella is also donating her wages from The Crown Room next Tuesday for the cause.  Come on, family–show some love ♥

(And thank you to everyone who’s donated so far.  Make no mistake–we take care of our own.)

I suspect you’re out on the town this gorgeous Oregon Saturday night so I’m going to tell you about the upcoming things that make me happy in my brainhole.

Monday, November 9:

BECAUSE JELLY IS BETTER THAN JAM.  This coming week, Sonic Jelly’s special guest will be Steve Wilkinson (Mission 5, Gravelpit.)  No cover and everyone is welcome and encouraged to sit in.  Get your musician on and kick it with some of the best music-makers in town.  Or, if you’re like me, just go listen and sing along from behind your whiskey drink.  (And this actually starts at 8:30pm, I believe.)

Tuesday, November 10:

Come by for Woosday Happy Hour from 5-7pm and enjoy some of the best damn food you ever might hope to have.  The gorgeous and inimitable Nico Bella will be presiding over one Crown Room kitchen.  I originally had a lot to say about this but I think Carl puts it best when he says:  “You know how you guys are always COMPLAINING about the Crown Room’s food?  Well put THIS in your mouth-hole and swallow!  NICO BELLA has made a Happy Hour menu of yummy home-cooked treats like pulled-porked sandwiches, mac n’ cheese, creamed corn, mashed potatoes & gravy and more.  It’s SO GOOD…and cheap!

THIS IS AN EXPERIMENT–if we don’t sell enough over the next couple of weeks we’re going back to SHIT FOOD.  Which, last I checked, tasted like SHIT.  For the love of all that is holy and DELICIOUS, get your butts down to the Crown Room tonight between 5 and 9 and come see a healed Carlovox and our tasty new Happy Hour menu! Yes?? Great!!“  So, yeah.  Carlovox will be slingin’ drinks as per usual and if you stick around long enough, Kellan and Avery will sling you some dubstep.  I’ll be sitting somewhere with a computer–I won’t be offended if you decide to come in and buy me a PBR.

Wednesday, November 11:

Trashcan Joe at The Moon and Sixpence.  http://www.myspace.com/trashcanjoe Want some ragtime vocal jazz with lyrically modern social statements?  A golden garbage treasure trove of trashy articulations?  Bring your swing dance partner and sip a tasty beverage and enjoy a bit of flea-bop/hobo intellectual/bum-rap.  How can you go wrong with musicians who make their own instruments?  One man’s trash is another man’s string bass.  (I’m totally not kidding.)

Thursday, November 12:

Ohmigodohmigodohmigod!  I have been assigned the task of drawing mustaches on anyone who may have missed ‘Stachetober.  Yes, we’re well on our way into Novembeard but that’s honestly neither here nor there.  Anyway, CMNHTN and Nicky Mason will begin the carnage promptly at 9:30 so get there and get ready to be slayed.

• If that’s not your scene, Miriam’s Well is playing at Ash St. Saloon on Thursday night.  If you haven’t met Mir, she’s fucking fantastic.  Creative and dedicated and totally conscious–if they still play “War No More,” you’re in for a real treat.  Show starts at 9pm and I’m gonna guess there’s like a $5 cover but don’t know for sure.

Friday, November 13:

It’s Maria’s birthday and we’re pulling out all the stops.  You won’t even recognize 24ten when we’re through.  And Beats fucking Antique???  What? This lineup is ridiculous.  It’s a party that’ll make you dance and feel good.  Supah dupah gypsy funk yumminess.  And there is a plan afoot to dress me as a belly dancer.  At the very least, you should make every effort to check this out for the comedy value alone.

• Oh but wait!  There is more.  Synchronic Wave is playing at The Jade Lounge on Friday night too.  I gotta say: it hurts a little to be missing this.  Groovy, chill, kinda bass-y.  Give it a listen here: http://www.myspace.com/synchronicwave and then maybe head down to The Jade Lounge because they also have really fantastic food and there’s no cover!

• And it’s a Jig-a-Lin Friday at The Crown Room too.  I hear Hometown Blap Clique has a new member–Barisone.  I’m pretty stoked on this new addition.  Barisone’s style is totally different and he doesn’t play dubstep.  WHAT???  Who does that?!  (Hahahahaha)  Check him out http://www.myspace.com/djbarisone.  I’m envisioning super cool things.  There’s no cover–go listen for me.

Saturday, November 14:

A celebration of Sound, Art and Culture. Hokay.  If you mind hasn’t been sufficiently blown by this week, it will SO happen at this show.  Just the openers are some of my favorite boys in town so when we get to Lazer Sword and Megasoid, hooooo-boy.  Get your PARTYFACE (1) on and please be advised that you’re going to be dancing your pants off.

Sunday, November 15:

Sleep.  All day.  No backtalk.  PartyMom has spoken.

I clearly have your week planned out for you.  I will consider it a personal affront if I don’t see you at least twice in the very near future.

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• So check this out: http://oregonmusicnews.com/blog/2009/11/06/qa-very-international-love-nathan-detroit-before-tonights-free-show/ I believe I was supposed to tell you about this a tad earlier so you could check these kids out tonight at Berbati’s but I was making waffle tacos.  PartyMom had to prioritize and maple butter came first.  Oops.  But give this a gander.  There are some links to tune-age.  It’s a new monthly with another of my Portland faves, Nathan Detroit so we can check it out in December.  (Actually, my FOMO is kicking my ass for missing Very International Love.  Past me was a total jerk to present me.)

• Kraddy has a new track out.  Electro retooled as bass-laden aural sex.  (Is it any wonder he’s one of my all-time favorites?)  Listen here:  http://soundcloud.com/kraddy/echascech-the-storm-kraddy-requiem-remix and then go buy it from one of the places listed here:  http://www.echaskech.com/site/storm-calm-ep-now-released.  It’s a moral imperative.

• “Is this your scene?” is the new “Hey, come here often?”  Just sayin’.

• Oh and bee-tee-double-you, Taylor Pate is getting super ripped and TAN.  Give him props when you see him at MSTRKRFT or FLUX.

• Click on this:  http://www.snacksandshit.com/2009/11/435.html Tee.

• Banana.

• Presales are $15 at https://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/86458 or at Metro on SE Hawthorne/$20 night of event.

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(1. Thank you, CMNHTN.)

So, anyway…we are surviving the Hamthrax* over here.  Thank you to everyone who took care of us while #1 son was suffering from his skyrocketing fever.  Now that he’s feeling better we can put the PARTY back in PartyMom.

*We don’t actually have the swine flu.

Starting with our makeups.  Have you visited Blush Beauty Bar on NW 23rd?  Every Friday is a Flirty Friday at Blush Beauty Bar!
They”ll make you up natural, glam or in-between–whatever your style, whatever the occasion.  Every Friday from 11-6, $30 redeemable in product.  Seriously, I get plenty of compliments on my makeups and can’t honestly take any credit for it.  I learned literally everything I know about makeup from the ladies at BBB.  You won’t walk out looking clowny (unless you ask for clowny ) like at some makeup counters in department stores, they use makeup that’s good for your skin (mineral, natural, organic, etc.) and Blush is locally owned.  Give ‘em a call at 503.227.3390 to set up an appointment.

Then you’ll be ready for all the fun, yummy awesomeness in store for your Friday night!

Like this:
A little fashion from Vibration Clothing, live performances by Krumbsnatcha and Tabliq and some music service from SPORTS CAR and DJ Staley at Report on East Burnside.  No cover!  I’m thinkin’ I might stop by here to start my night.  I haven’t been to Report since the changeover from The Chesterfield so this would be a good time to check things out and say hi and give air kisses to my lovely, beautiful friends, non?

And then over to The Crown Room (naturlich) for

I am of the opinion that if something were to be described thusly:  “An evening of dirty bomb skwee, body-melting 8-bit distortion funk, pop shrapnel-core, mutant future bass, deep ghetto bliss, sparkling jazz crunk, time-rending shift hop, macro-glitch madness and neo-balkan synth storms” I probably should check that out.

But that’s just me.

If I were to be someone other than me, I’d also give some of this other stuff a try:

• Very International Love album release party at Someday Lounge http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=182941883635&index=1 Go read those descriptions.  I might try to sneak over to check some of that out.  Those kids sound like FUN.

• R9 at Groove Suite http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=149649404140&index=1 The Relaunching Party.  Go get your rave on with some George Holland and Bryan Zentz.  It is simply ridiculous how good these two men are with the technoz.  No jokes.

• My friend, Spyder, will be dancing with fire at Doc’s Club 82.  She’s one of those people who makes fire so fucking sexy……mmmmmmmmmmm…..

• And, as per usual, Doctor Adam will be Townbombing at Tube with DJ Marvel.  2-for-one beers, no cover, Adam rules–this is never a bad time.

Then go home, sleep it off, start over.  Because Saturday is just as fun and just as packed.  I’m scheduled for at least 4 different things.  (One of them is work.  Meh.)

HyDrive is playing at BurnOut.  Portland’s Burning Man Decompression party from 6-7 pm.
The Mobile Groove Bomb Trifecta will also be making an appearance.   Solovox, Manoj and GlobalRuckus can service all your dancy needs should you choose this as your party.

I, on the other hand, will be singing along at the Moulin Rouge Chanson-A-Long!
Have I ever told you how much I love this movie.  I’m listening to the soundtrack right now.  Performances by Sadie laGuerre, Wanderlust Circus and The Good Time Girls.  For just five dollars!  At the Bagdad!  But don’t just take my word for it, read more here:  http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=130377502807&index=1 The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return………

And then to The Crown Room again for some of my favorite boys in town:
Geno’s back in Portland and I hear that all four Blap Clique members will be in attendance.  Do you have any idea how happy this makes me??? Not to mention CMNHTN (who just slays.  fer real. slays.) and Andrew from Boy Meets Club.  It’s free and it’s Andrew’s birthday.  If you aren’t at Decom, I expect to see you on the dance floor with me………

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And for your perusal:

• KILLER DUBSTEP MIX from my friend, Cory O.  http://soundcloud.com/cory-o/fuck-your-9-5-cory-o-freestyle-mix Fuck  Your 9 to 5.  This is a boy after my own heart.

• Tripods from LostMachine Andy and crew are for sale!

You may have seen them at the Burning Man Festival or at The Crown Room on Tuesday nights.  Andy is raising money for his pirate ship art car project for said Burning Man Festival.  The new version is programmed to pulsate with the beat of whatever music you happen to be playing.  It’s pretty bitchin’.  Plus I’ve helped make these.  Mine is named The Sentinel.  If you’re interested, contact Andy here:  http://lostmachine.com/

• I’m also loving the new self-titled cd from Throwback Suburbia. Fun, mod pop that I’ve had in my head for days now.  Listen on their website: http://www.throwbacksuburbia.com/Music.html and order it directly from them or pick up a copy at Music Millenium.  (You can also grab it on iTunes but I never actually recommend that.  For obvious reasons.)

• You can also still order magazines from my daughter for like one more week.  Whether you want to subscribe or need to renew, it’s for a good cause!  Email me at partymom@kerichang.com for full details.

• Lest you all forget.  FLUX. in November.  Get your presale tickets at http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/82502

• and this is kyoot.  tee hee hee…  http://www.kenbrashear.com/

AND I ALMOST FORGOT!  MONDAY!  My very dear friend, Rich Landar, a great Portland musician is hosting Sonic Jelly at Mt. Tabor Theater Lounge.
Bring your instrument and kick it and make some music.  You know, like we do…

First, I’m going with my friend, Arin, to Mono at Doug Fir.  Epic gorgeousness for our earholes to be sure.  http://www.myspace.com/monojp

Then, I gotta go see all my boys at Rotture/Branx for Super Kidz and Bass Boom respectively.

We all know that Kellan and Avery bring it every Tuesday for you at See You Next Tuesday, (still one of my favorite club night titles, like, EVARRR…) but Countzero is home from his travels abroad.  This should be funnnnnnnnnn…

Free sample!  Here’s a mix from my good pal, Cory O.  http://soundcloud.com/cory-o/cory-o-freestyle-bass-boom-8-14-09-1 I heard CMNHTN a couple weeks ago at The Crown Room and he just SLAYED–new favorite for sure.  I’ll get to hear Boy Meets Club for the first time tonight.  Super stoked on that.

And did I mention that there’s NO COVER?  That’s right.  Two floors of sexy dubstep for all your weekend whomp needs and all you have to do is bring a few bucks for your PBR.  And maybe a couple more to buy one for me too?

I’ll be your best friend…  But if the dubstep isn’t your thing, there’s always some other real good stuff.  Peruse, if you will:

• 10th Annual Miss White Trash Pageant at Mt. Tabor Theater–my friend, Rich Landar (KEYBOARD EXTRAORDINAIRE!) will be playing keys for Jesus Presley.  Free admission for anyone in a tube top!  White trash costume contest!  $7-9

• Church of Burlesque at The Lotus Seed on 4349 NE 9th.  Our very own Sadie LaGuerre and her beautiful, talented and freaky friends open the doors of a 1927 church for a night of sacreligious entertainment!  $3 cover

• And as per usual, Doctor Adam is throwing down, hip hop style at Fresh at Report tonight.

If I could be 5 places at once, tonight is one night that I would certainly try.

Then, because you’ll still have so much energy tomorrow, here’s your heads up for Sunday:

• 23rd Annual AIDS Walk Portland.  The Portland Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence are walking.  You can support them by visiting: http://cap.kintera.org/faf/search/searchTeamPart.asp?ievent=307185&lis=1&kntae307185=480A1917BDC04170A8B0D542CE4741A2&team=3494851

• My friend Mike’s band, Throwback Suburbia, is playing a rare unplugged set at Music Millenium at 3pm.  They just released a CD that is garnering some really terrific press.  Come by to hear a great band and maybe support your local record store.  They’re an endangered species after all…

• Now, I’ll need help with the next one.  I was just made aware that Junior Boys are playing at Doug Fir but Metronomy is playing at Holocene.  I’ve never seen Metronomy live but what do you think?
  www.myspace.com/metronomy
  www.myspace.com/juniorboys

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AND HAVE YOU HEARD ABOUT THESE?????

OHMIGOD!  A Moulin Rouge SING-A-LONG!

I know you all just love to hear me sing.  This is one of my favorites to just belt out.  Srsly.  October 17 at the Bagdad.  Supah dupah YUMMINESS.

And my HyDrive boys are playing Portland’s Decompression party from 6-7 on one of the outdoor stages at

But here’s the crazy one:

HOLY SHIT.  CHECK OUT THIS LINEUP.  ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?  If I don’t see you at this party, we might not be able to be friends anymore.

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And just a few FYIs:

• Mini-Me is still selling magazines for West Sylvan Middle School.  Get at me if you are interested in ordering a magazine or renewing.

• When Chuck Norris enters a room, he doesn’t turn the lights on, he turns the dark off.

See you out there.

Anyway, if you had friends who looked like this?

Athena Aura for Miss Nude Oregon 2009!

Wouldn’t you go too?  Miss Nude Oregon 2009 competition tonight at 9 pm at The Dolphin II on Beaverton-Hillsdale Highway.  Cover is $25.  Yeah.  Ouch.  Read what Athena herself has to say about it all:

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=4335818&id=169813547673#/event.php?eid=166736304151&index=1

Wear black and electric blue.  Bring your fedora.  Bring your dollars to buy her more votes.  BRING CHAMPAGNE.

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Then, if you can stay up late with the big kids, let’s BOMB THE MOON.  There was something about it passing through our sky around 2 am and the actual impact will occur around 4 am PST.  Won’t be able to witness impact without a telescope so watch NASA tv:

http://www.nasa.gov/multimedia/nasatv/index.html

Here’s what’s going down in space today:  http://wiki.nasa.gov/cm/blog/lcrossfdblog/posts/post_1254984713637.html

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My friends Mi’ka and Kala released a new EP today.  Check it out!  RIGHT NOW!  https://www.beatport.com/en-US/html/content/release/detail/193320/mochi_ep#app=34e2&a486-index=0

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West Sylvan is still having their magazine drive!  Renew yer magazines here!

And from everyone’s favorite, www.textsfromlastnight.com:
(919): Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! “Your” is for something that belongs to you, like ‘your herpes’. And “you’re” is a contraction for “you are”, like “you’re not sleeping with me”.

Because check this shit out:

Every Tuesday at The Crown Room, Kellan and Avery host an evening of dubstep just for your listening pleasure.  Tomorrow they will be accompanied by Max Power and Hecca.  So start your weekend off right — stop by, have an Iced Tietze or Carlarita.  Bring your friends…

That’s right.  I said weekend.  I’ve long said that the weekend starts on Tuesday.

i miss his mustache

I might also be remiss if I failed to mention that Nathan Detroit and Freaky Outty will be playing at Tube.  Holla ‘N Oates back in action.  Aren’t they cute?

i think he actually HATES this photo...

(The answer is YES.)

Oops.  Wednesday.  I actually have a meeting on Wednesday, so I guess you’re on your own.  I bet there’s something neat at Tube or Dante’s.  Or maybe you should go to bed early because Wednesday is the new Sunday and Thursday is the new black.  That is to say, you need to rest up?

For Thursday.  Thursdaythursdaythursday….
I want you to come support Athena Aura in the Miss Nude Oregon 2009 Finals at The Dolphin II on Beaverton-Hillsdale Highway.  Yes, I heard it was $20 cover; we are confirming accuracy of this poste haste.  While I figure it out, click on Athena:  http://www.facebook.com/pages/ATHENA-AURA/169813547673?ref=ts#/pages/ATHENA-AURA/169813547673?v=wall The Mobile Groove Bomb will be in action.  All the cool kids will be there…

Then stay up all night to watch them BOMB THE MOON.  http://science.nasa.gov/headlines/y2009/05oct_lcrossvg.htm Who has a telescope?  We’re gonna need the freeze-dried ice cream for this!

Friday.  Phew.  So much.  Lemme get back to you.  My stuffy nose and persistent cough demand sleep.

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Don’t forget about Mini-Me’s magazine drive for her school.

And vote for me for governor of Oregon. It’ll be great.  Srsly.